I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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