Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
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