Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
