I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I need a hoe opinion
Your youporn search history says otherwise.