So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize