So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
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Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
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There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
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