he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize