Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I will be naked everywhere
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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