Fine. I'll sleep in my office
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Just high enough for therapy.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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