She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
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Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
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idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices