JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize