YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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