Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
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would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
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I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.