Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
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