Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
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He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
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You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
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