I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Everclear isn't food dammit
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
