I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize