oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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