She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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