You work out of a Hotel?
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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