Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
