I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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