Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize