you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
