I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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