I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
the raccoons are back...
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