you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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