ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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