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Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
She's the barista slut.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
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