You can't motorboat a personality
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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