I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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