apparently the secret to your success is patron
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
