areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize