careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize