hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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