I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
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Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
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She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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