I would do horrible things to your vagina.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.