apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize