I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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