It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
