you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
