Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.