Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.

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  (847): he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants. (1-847): you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him. http://tfl.nu/yg4d
  Replies (25) Good night (450) Bad night (2765)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"

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  (954): I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies" http://tfl.nu/cnee
  Replies (16) Good night (4756) Bad night (1073) Order T-Shirt
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  (254): View more from Texas

  The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium

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  (254): The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium http://tfl.nu/41rv
  Replies (20) Good night (3284) Bad night (1329) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.

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  (913): I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better. http://tfl.nu/gf52
  Replies (6) Good night (1807) Bad night (3105) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.

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  (614): trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room. http://tfl.nu/9qb1
  Replies (17) Good night (973) Bad night (5819)
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  (951): View more from California

  I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal

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  (951): I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal http://tfl.nu/pmv6
  Replies (23) Good night (10171) Bad night (879)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better

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  (773): arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better http://tfl.nu/ch4v
  Replies (19) Good night (5459) Bad night (1014) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car

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  (412): At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car http://tfl.nu/wr7k
  Replies (9) Good night (1806) Bad night (974) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.

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  (617): she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax. http://tfl.nu/m9dz
  Replies (3) Good night (1108) Bad night (725) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!

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  (207): You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?! http://tfl.nu/i02d
  Replies (14) Good night (1693) Bad night (371) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?

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  (303): Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night? http://tfl.nu/dyw8
  Replies (11) Good night (1964) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
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  (661): View more from California

  Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.

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  (661): Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them. http://tfl.nu/la60
  Replies (5) Good night (1115) Bad night (371) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  crossed #23 off the Slucket List!

  (1-925): View more from California

  YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.

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  (925): crossed #23 off the Slucket List! (1-925): YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING. http://tfl.nu/ln8o
  Replies (6) Good night (2519) Bad night (454) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.

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  (513): If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy. http://tfl.nu/099u
  Replies (7) Good night (938) Bad night (279) Order T-Shirt
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.

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  (506): I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work. http://tfl.nu/gsqk
  Replies (1) Good night (157) Bad night (444) Order T-Shirt

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