I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF