that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
