I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize