Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
