Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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