My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize