It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize