she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
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And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
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Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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